Many of you sent questions for our recent AMA, but we only had time to answer a few of them live. For those of you who asked additional questions in the chat, here are my thoughts.
Q. If someone is socially open, independent, leads a full life and does all the ‘right’ things—mingles, connects, puts themselves out there—can they still simply not meet the right person, or does that usually signal something unconscious at play?
A. This is a great question to ask yourself: am I doing something I’m not aware of? Am I inadvertently making my own roadblocks? However, I would caution against personalizing something that may be much more cultural and societal than just your own psychological mechanisms. How are you currently trying to meet people? Have you been open to different ways? Have you asked your friends to introduce you to people that they know? Have you gone to events that are specifically set up to introduce people to each other? Given that you are independent and outgoing, you may find that friends introducing their single friends is something that you would welcome. And sometimes, I would say, have you ever noticed that the right person may be right there next to you?
Q. How do you know when to talk with a new partner about exclusivity? How do you know if you’re moving too fast? I’m excited about someone I’ve been seeing for about two months. I really like her, and I want to move the relationship forward. But I’m also wary of spooking her and also aware that maybe what I really want is reassurance.
